|So glad you could make it. Are those treats?|
Have you heard of American Eskimos? I'm one. Seriously. Stop looking. And don't be cheap with the treats either, we're having a conversation here. It's polite to offer snacks on social occasions. Anyway, back to American Eskimos. We're a guarding breed, did you know that? We're supposed to be wary of new people. I'm an exemplary example of my breed. I'm very wary of new people - please, enough with the looking, we've talked about this - and I'm very alert. When I know you I'm loving and affectionate but that takes a while. Guarding breed. You can't be too careful these days.
|Hand one of those over. Stat.|
Where did you put the rest of those liver treats?
As I was saying, since we're getting to know each other....I'm naturally wary and the events of the past few months have made me a little warier. Surely you understand. I keep my secrets but I can tell you what's on the record. I was found wandering around near a busy street. A nice gentleman took me and tried to find my owner. When he asked around, neighbors told him there had been two of us Eskies but our owner had passed.....
You really need to work on eye contact. It's can be threatening to dogs, you know. And it makes me nervous. The more you look over there and keep handing out treats the quicker I'll come around to you.
Anyway, our owner had passed and somehow I wound up wandering the streets. The nice gentleman tried to keep me but he didn't have the time so he brought me here. A few days later someone else found another Eskie, less than a half mile from where I had been. We played a few times at the shelter but we weren't overly attached to each other. They couldn't confirm that we had been together but what are the chances, right?
Did you put the treats away? Why would you do that? Watch the hands now, let's not get grabby. We don't know each other that well yet. Is that cheese? I love cheese.
|I just love you, Jeri. No treats required.|
They found out that I'M WONDERFUL. I'm sweet and affectionate and once I'm friends with you I never, ever forget you. I adore my friends. They can look at me and hug me and play with me all day long. I'll do anything for my friends.
It's time for me to branch out, move into a place of my own. So here's what I'm thinking - can I have another piece of that? Thanks - so what I'm thinking is someone who knows what we're like, us American Eskimos, and loves us. Even if they don't know Eskies specifically, someone who can work with a little bit of wariness. Someone who doesn't expect that affection comes cheap. If you want cheap affection get a lab, I say.* But if you're looking for a deep, committed relationship, a relationship like a fine wine that grows more complex and rich every day, than come meet me.
That cheese really is fantastic, thanks. Do you have more of those liver treats? You do? I couldn't possibly.... oh, well, yes. I guess I could. Hand them over.
|You may rub the belly.|
But yes, come meet me. We'll need to be introduced by one of my social circle.You'll come in with one of my friends and while they tell you all about me you can give me treats. Maybe we'll work up to some patting. Have you seen my coat? Gorgeous, right? It'll require regular grooming but beauty requires care. Upkeep, you know. It's all about upkeep.
Anyway, pass me another piece of cheese if you would, great. So yes, we'll meet through a mutual friend. You should probably call to set up an appointment for our first date right now. Call Casaundra Cruz - she's acting as my social secretary. Her number is (408)262-2133 ext 183. Bring liver treats. And cheese.
*Absolutely no offense meant to labs. The transcriber of this interview shares her home with a lab-ish.