August is such a bittersweet month. On one hand it's summer: beach, trips, vacation, warm weather - yay! On the other hand it's usually too hot and the prospect of fall and/or school days looms large - boo!
The good news is August also hosts a lot of really, really ridiculous holidays you never knew or cared existed before. The dogs of HSSV would like you to know about these as all of them are prime opportunities to call in sick and adopt a dog like you've been meaning to all summer.
For instance, did you know August is National Admit You're Happy Month?
|I'm so happy I just peed in the pool.|
Do you get sucked in to the romance of melancholia? Addicted to drama and have a hard time admitting everything is actually hunky dory? Put your Morrissey shirt away and come in and meet Patches. Medical studies have proven it is clinically impossible to be sad when confronted with a dog in a kiddie pool with a stuffed owl. True fact. It's from the Mayo Clinic or something. We swear.*
August 8th is National Sneak A Zucchini Onto Your Neighbor's Porch Day.
|I swear it wasn't me...|
While we don't have any dogs who can grow zucchini, we do have some drop-dead adorable pups like two month old Logan. While he won't sneak a zucchini on the porch, puppies will leave you something sneaky in the hallway that requires Febreze to clean up if you don't keep an eye on them. However they are adorable and fun and therefore worth the hassle.
August 10th is National Lazy Day.
|Every day is National Lazy Day. It's National Lazy Lifetime for me...|
Maui totally has this one. She'll take the 15th, too, which is National Relaxation Day. Naps on the sofa are better with a corpulent snoring boxer mix. Another clinically proven medical fact. **
August 18th is National Bad Poetry Day.
Mirchi gives it a shot:
|I've got this. Before I was a shelter dog I was an English major***|
Roses are red.
Oof. Not great. Polly, you want to try?
|I'm no Maya Angelou but I'll have a go...|
How do I tell thee...
I pooped in the kitchen.
August 23rd is National Ride The Wind Day.
|I'm a plane! I'm a big puffy, curly plane!|
Baxter is on this one like frosting on cake. He might not stay airborne for long, but he's totally willing to keep trying.
And finally August 28th is Race Your Mouse Day.
|Oh trust me, I'll make that mouse run.....|
Niko is very, very interested in the prospect of watching any rodents you might have racing. That said, please don't let him as we don't trust his intentions.
Now that you have a plethora of reasons to take a day off, call in and come meet the pooches.
** Absolute horsepucky but we believe it to be true.
***No offense to English majors.